The Feeling You May Not Even Know You Have

So, did you work on finding that perfect balance in being both helpful and helpable?

These two are the most advantageous team member characteristics there could possibly be.  You will be the one other people look up to and appreciate as the rising tide for your team.

Now, if you take this to the next level, you can and should deliberately orchestrate this with your team… we call it divide and conquer.  You create a hierarchy of priorities that are then assigned to team members.  Each action item becomes their responsibility but does require effective support from others.  This is how you translate a team of helpful and helpable people into an efficient and effective operation.

Our best practices revisit their divide and conquer strategy with transparent discussions and assessments at least twice a year.  Of course, there are certainly additional opportunities to update your divide conquer approach when significant change occurs (for example, we a new team member in added or the usual circumstances that you’ve experienced this year).

The bigger point here (and what I was making last week), is that helpful and helpable are more attitudes and mentalities first; actions and behaviors second; and habits and routines third.

Of course, there is the other alternative (also a mindset and attitude), that is so often buried deep inside of a person’s self-confidence resulting in a subtle self-sabotaging insecurity that ends up making a person helpless.

This can stem from external or internal sources, but regardless of where it comes from, feeling helpless can be destructive. 

If it were only as easy as simply rejecting the initial reaction and attempting to be more helpable.  However, it takes more effort than that. 

If you or someone on your team is defensive, frustrated, or overwhelmed, try talking with them.  Get them to open up and share where these feelings truly originate.  I promise you just talking about it – no matter what the topic – will make a powerful difference.  Just being honest about one’s feelings will allow confidence to grow.  

When you know you aren’t battling something alone, you feel supported, empowered, and capable – all of the antidotes to helplessness.

Second, you should always remember that doing beats thinking when you are stuck feeling helpless.  The worst approach for anyone is to wallow, sit idle, and dwell.  Instead take action – any action – to break free from the stalemate.  Motion, as the famous quote says, beats meditation.

We all experiences these episodes of helplessness throughout our lives.  You could make a list of the areas where you feel helpless or activities that shake your confidence.  Then go to work on yourself.  You will be amazed at how free and energized you feel.  You may not have even noticed how they are bogging you down and burdening you physically, mentally, and emotionally. 

This week, I’d like you to consider three things…

First, where can you expand on instilling helpful and helpable into your practice culture by putting in a structured method that makes it actionable.  Get everyone’s input on how to employ divide and conquer – which is in itself a big giant leap towards being helpable: listening to others and being open to advice, guidance, support… help.

Second, where in particular do you feel you are stuck, frustrated, or helpless?  What’s in your own personal way of believing and then actually doing what it takes to get to the next level?

Third, and absolutely most importantly, make the personal list I have addressed here in this week’s Monday Morning Huddle so that you can be released of any burden weighing you down whether figuratively or literally.  

Now, let’s get to work on this and make a commitment to yourself to be willing to receive help and offer it to others so together you can forge ahead towards success.