Whether you would classify yourself as a “happy” person or not doesn’t matter. Everyone can be “happier” and what you wear on the outside is of course always a reflection of what you are wearing on the inside.
I’ll be the first to say that feelings are feelings. Still, they can be stimulated by letting outside people, places, and things affect your inside self and there is nothing wrong with that.
That said, you do have control over what you do with those feelings and you also have control over what you let those feelings do to you.
Over time, you can gain the power, if you want it, to choose how you feel. It is possible. Feelings do not have to be uncontrollably reactive.
You have your thoughts and you have your feelings and you get to decide which one leads the others.
I’m not telling you what you should or shouldn’t do or how you should or shouldn’t be. Of course, like anyone else, I love to ‘be in the moment’ – and to ‘feel’ as it happens, but…
There are times when any human lets their feelings get the best of them. Perhaps they even start believing things about themselves or others based on how they ‘feel.’ This can become negative or positive and often it’s both. You are the only one that can protect yourself and you are the only one who has the say-so about how you feel about anything.
The permission is yours to give or to deny, always.
I write this to you because I can promise that if you are going to find your inner truest self and you are going to be the happiest you can be in order to make the biggest impact on others – including your spouse, kids, parents, friends, patients, and team members – you first have to make the impact on yourself.
We call this self-worth or self-esteem or self-image and while they each do mean something dramatically different – they are generally speaking all about how you feel about YOU.
Last week, I gave you the objective that we all know but very few do anything about. That is growing from the inside out. Whatever you want to be, do, have, feel, or experience in your life begins first with your experience with yourself. These feelings certainly matter the most.
There are some things I recommend in some way, shape, or form of which you can make them your own. Here are a few to have in your routine…
Perhaps there is nothing more valuable and powerful, for multiple reasons, than having a Gratitude Journal. A journal where you write down and talk about everything you are grateful for. Including, once again, yourself.
Everyday when you focus on what you are grateful for you become happier, more appreciative, and more grounded. You keep life in perspective and with that comes a level head, it builds a calming confidence, and just maybe there is nothing more significant than that for you.
In addition, you develop the ability and the habit to always focus on the positive first. To see the positive in others and also in yourself. To document and really believe in attracting more things going your way, rather than problems.
This also goes to your environment and what you consume with your mouth, your ears, your eyes, your mind, and your soul. The great Zig Ziglar said to fill your mind, body, and soul with “the good, the clean, the pure, the powerful and the positive.”
You really do get to decide what goes in and I’m here to tell you what goes in is what comes out. It is what determines how you feel about yourself and others. How you feel about yourself and others is also what determines your life in all respects and it begets that expression that is more true than anyone would ever really want to admit…
Your perception is your reality. For better or worse, for good or bad, for you or others. Perception becomes reality and that’s why these things matter so much.
We say “what you focus on, you get more of.”
My goal for you today is to focus more on what you are grateful for and to surround yourself inside and out with positive everything. Learn that how you see yourself matters more than anything else.
And the only way to know that is to experience personal self-reflection (which is the next one on my list), so you can have honest conversations without judgment with yourself.
And then there is visualization and the practice of quieting your mind similar to meditation. Both of which are very cleansing for you in a way you need the most.
There you go, a few things to get you started if you are up to the challenge and want to strengthen your most important attribute – your own personal value.
To be continued…