When Losing Ends…

Last week, I brought up the most important conversation you have.  Yes, the one with yourself.  And we talked about the clutter in your mind that gets in your way of your own success and being truly present.

It’s very interesting because only the people who embrace positive self-talk experience the benefits of it… happier, a better attitude, people are nicer to you, things go your way more easily and more often.

The opposite of course is continuing to be a naysayer and negative; to both expect and experience the worst; to sabotage your efforts as a result of your own self-worth or cynical belief about others.  The thing is these types of people never grasp that it is their own thinking that is serving as the catalyst for everything else.  It is the cause, instead of their thoughts being the effect.

Their negativity spirals as they remain oblivious and in denial.  They turn to excuses and blame, therefore never make any changes or give themselves a chance to have more control by accepting more responsibility over their own thoughts, actions, feelings, words, beliefs, etc.

Don’t miss the depth of last week’s message and the application of it (both in and out of the practice).  Still, it is far more important to you – personally – this concept, principle, and way of being.

As I said last week, we are continuing on this path and I’d like to move it into the talk you have either in your head or actually out loud with each other (or even worse with your patients).

Several weeks back I did bluntly address this.  Now, coming full circle, you can see where the origin of the thoughts come from – you.

That is the fact that there is self-sabotage, self-talk, and personal thoughts that actually lead to all the things you don’t want.

Patients who don’t accept treatment, who aren’t appreciative, and who don’t value dentistry.  You being overly stressed or rushed or frustrated.  Or insert anything else.  

If we work backwards, a person often sets themselves up for failure by what they have already told themselves is going to be their outcome.  If the reality of the future (which hasn’t happened yet), you’ve already decided that it’s going to be something less than ideal – guess what – you are likely going to be right.

So, if you are going to visualize and think about ‘the future’ why not pretend it is going to be exactly the way you want it instead of the way you don’t.  

This comes up when we focus on insurance or we become a patient sympathizer instead of a patient motivator.  

Until you commit to and actually believe that you can influence outcomes with your own thoughts and actions, you will be victim with your fate at the mercy of other people.

Think back to a time when you thought a patient would not be able to afford treatment or will use insurance as an excuse, were you right?  How about when you say that you aren’t going to have enough time or you will be too rushed, were you right then as well?

We say these things and believe them to be a default reality.  We sit back and wait for confirmation we were right along.  

Instead, we should be fighting these assumptions with positivity and optimism.  You won’t always right, but you won’t always be wrong either.

I’ll never forgot some of what I heard on my very first Zig Ziglar cassette tape way back when.

He would always say when people ask “how are you doing,” instead of thinking about it and regardless of how you might actually feel in the moment why not just say how you want to be feeling and make it a habit to project hopefulness.

Something positive such as, “Everything is going extremely well,” can only improve your day. 

Far too many people wallow in their own sympathy and wonder why they can’t seem to get out of it. They don’t realize they climbed in and have chosen to stay there, when they can just as easily climb out.  The same goes for your attitude with your patients, your work, and your life.

Kevin has his brilliant statement that he lives by and has made his core philosophy for others, “Choose to be Extraordinary.”

The lessons and magic are in the first word because you can change the last word to anything you want – but the responsibility is in realizing that it’s your choice.

The best practices with the most consistent success are the ones that expect it, that choose it, and that refuse to let anything stand in their patients’ way of victory.

It’s always a shame, in my mind, when we talk to a practice that has a long list of excuses as to why they can’t breakthrough to the next level… and none of their actions, beliefs, or names are on the list.  There’s no hope for them because they are looking at everything backwards.

Then, not too far away in an area nearly identical to theirs, you see a practice exactly like them doing not a little better but often twice the amount of dentistry with all variables being the same.  You wonder how can this be…

But I don’t, wonder that is, I know.  It’s because they’ve made the choice to be that way.  They’ve decided to cast off excuses, accept accountability, and expect a better result.

You too can control your outcomes if you embrace the responsibility of winning and rid yourself of negative thoughts, actions, behaviors, and beliefs.  The simple fact is: losing ends when you decide.  

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